Board Games Predict Your Future!
Did you really think that you were just passing time? Just having fun? Doing some “family bonding” on family game nights? Nope. What you were doing was shaping your future!
In the first comprehensive study of its kind done by Nils Tutoo, BSa*, it was shown that the way a person plays board games is an indicator of future endeavours. In the study**, those who were good at playing Monopoly in their childhood were more likely to own property in their adulthood. Conversely, those who usually lost at the game Monopoly in their childhood were less likely to own property in the future.
The study** also showed that those who excelled at the game Operation went on to use their hands in their work. Those who were poor at the game Operation did not end up in jobs that required a steady hand. In the game Payday, people who went broke before the end of the month ended up living beyond their means, while those who accumulated money pay their credit cards regularly. Interestingly, those who tried to roll the die and increase funds when they got the “Swellfare” card ended up having an affinity for chance games.
The game Chinese Checkers was an accurate predictor of business acumen, with good players going on to run businesses rather than working for others. Regular checkers was an inverse predictor of patience, with good chess players having the highest tolerance for stress and highest patience, but the worst self-loathing and unreal self-expectations.
Trivial Pursuit players were frought with unnecessary knowledge, leading them to be instructional and somewhat snobby in adulthood. Most became high school teachers. Cribbage players became sharp and successful in careers with a mathematical slant. Memory game players were the most predictable – good players excelled at university exams, while poorer players were better at jobs that required on-the-spot thinking (ie. EMTs, nurses, etc.)
Those who liked to play Trouble went into jobs that required some level of ruthlessness, and those who played Perfection found themselves in high-paced, stressful jobs like stock trading. Future entrepreneurs preferred (and were good at) Battleship, Risk, and Mindtrap.
Those who enjoyed Clue went on to sleuthing careers, some writing mystery novels and others solving crimes with law enforcements. Dungeons and Dragons people went into the film industry mostly, with some branching out into graphic design careers.
These findings*** were shockingly (in)accurate! Which games were YOU good at??
*Nils Tutoo, BSa = 0 to 2, which = no 1, and BSa = a Bull Shit acronym.
**the study was conducted in my own mind as I remembered my friends and the games we played and where they ended up.
***finding where I left my keys is harder than making up this “study”. I hope you don’t take it seriously…